Birth Priorities

It’s a long way off, but here they are, definitely in descending order of importance.

  1. I don’t die.
  2. Baby doesn’t die.
  3. *Everything* gets fully explained to me at every point.
  4. We’re both healthy.
  5. Time to bond and initiate breastfeeding directly after birth.
  6. DH and doula with me as much as I want them.
  7. No-one takes offence if I want to be alone at any point.
  8. Avoid ICU.
  9. No separation between me and baby after birth.
  10. Avoid Caesarean section.
  11. Contact with my daughters during labour and any/all hospital time.
  12. *I* choose the position of the bed, however I’m using it. (Sitting/lying on it, or leaning against it.)
  13. No epidural.
  14. Avoid induction.
  15. Not stuck on bed during labour or birth.
  16. I choose my birth position.
  17. Mobility as I want it and feel up to.
  18. Allow labour to begin naturally.
  19. Food and drink I want, when I want them.
  20. Funny, light-hearted books with nothing to do with birth, motherhood, health, etc.


I would love a home birth, but it’s not something I feel safe enough to hope for, let alone organise. I can’t face the disappointment of things not going as I want, again. That’s why I’m making this priority list. I want everything on this list, and just because I don’t get something higher doesn’t mean everything else can be discounted, but it does give me various points to potentially count as success, even if I don’t get to have it all.

This list may well change over the next few months (I’m sure there are things I’ve left off), but here’s the starter version.


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